Monday, January 5, 2015

Where have I been? Who the hell knows?

Things have been weird. I admit it. I have been dealing with an anxiety disorder, and as a self-confessed control freak, this condition has been less than pleasant to manage and cope with. I won't go on and on about the condition, I think I described it well enough in the last post. My challenge has been adjusting medications so that I can function.  I had hoped it was temporary, but alas it isn't. I know this because a small lapse in my anti-freakout meds and I start having flashes of extreme panic. It's so weird. Anyway, besides struggling with fatigue and nausea, I'm okay. I think things are slowly normalizing.  I'm now on Effexor and Buspar. My days of being medication free are over. For now. The upside is that I spend so much time being nauseous that I forget to eat, and I have lost a few pounds.

What has the Hungarican Chick been up to otherwise? Oh, this and that. I was hoping to have two books finished for Comic-Con this year, but I haven't been able to write with all this mental-health crap going on. So I will be promoing my normal stuff, and hopefully selling a few things, like bookmarks and postcards of some book covers (in addition to books and eBooks).

I've done a tiny bit of sewing, not much. Held a workshop on how to make Dormeuse caps, set up this new year's Topsails & Tea for the ORS, baked some, slept as much as I could manage, did a lot of reading, and obsessed over the G5 game 'Secret Society". It's annoyingly addictive. I find however, that the ambient music is really calming. I know.  The child is growing at an incredible rate. We had his Santa picture taken again this year.


He's grown, hasn't he? My boy. ::sniff::  I wish he'd stop growing! He's climbing everywhere and getting into everything. He displays a terrifyingly familiar sense of mischievousness and humour already. We're so screwed.  His second birthday was November 17, but we had a party on the 16th. The house was so full, I thought I was going to have a full on scream and flail attack, but I managed to bite it back and wasn't rude to anyone that I am aware of. So that's  a win. He was spoiled by his family, and then again at Christmas. The house is so full of toys right now I have no idea how to deal with it all. LOL.

Some bears and bunnies I made for a fair at Trackers Earth.
They're made from re-purposed receiving blankets. The bears,
specifically from Alex's receiving blankets.
I've also been job-hunting. Our finances are so terrible, I'm pretty sure that this is what the anxiety problems are about. But I am finding the process to be particularly stressful and painful. I am either under-qualified on paper for jobs I could do with my eyes closed, or overqualified, and all the jobs I find are underpaid. So much so, it would barely cover the $300 a week for daycare if at all.  The constant rejection is taking its toll on my ego. Someone who has such a broad skill base and great learning skills like I do should be a valuable employee, but instead I find myself competing with people with foo-foo degrees and zero experience. It's really annoying, and making me bitter. LOL.

So things have been marginally boring and uneventful on the most part. I've retrenched and been focusing on my mental balance and keeping the baby happy. Now I'm planning for the upcoming Comic Con at the end of January, and trying to prepare enough materials for it. I've done some sewing for a fair (pictured above).  I need to get back into my old habits and get back to blogging and creating. I feel kind of pent-up for not doing so lately.  So apologies to my regular readers for being super-quiet. And here is my video on how to patch/reinforce old jeans where the denim has thinned or torn.


I will work on some projects to share, probably after the 'Con. Happy New Year to all of my online friends and acquaintances. :)

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