Yes. I'm alive. I have been however, struggling a great deal with my brain chemistry, and in part, it's given me little energy to focus with. I have been writing. That's a good thing. And doing some editing work to finish up the next two books I will be releasing this year. But I haven't done much else except try to take care of my kid and sometimes, even myself.
I started going back to talk therapy for one. And my anti-depressant seems to have hit the two-year poop-out, and stopped working, so my doctor doubled the dose, and I have been creeping out from under my rock to see the light, hissing and scowling all the way. But this week, I've been feeling something close to normal. Which is amazing after having spent the past quarter of a year in depression and anxiousness.
Part of my crash was the significant reduction of a creative outlet. Another part was my removing myself from the Oregon Regency Society, which took a lot (way too much) of my emotional energy, and without that, I sort of got lost. When you've had something like that to keep you focused for ten years, and suddenly there's all this open space in your head where the drama used to live, yeah, it can be jarring. It's been healthy for me to leave that aside. To give me the chance to dream up new ventures without the baggage of difficult, unkind and attention-hungry people.
In the meantime, my husband, who is a fucking hero, was talking about using our tax returns to put together some kind of she-shed for me so I could have space for my sewing, crafting, writing and miniatures without taking over the house, and without tiny fingers getting into all my stuff. It's something I've wanted for a long time. I've literally stopped sewing because it's been such a pain to hear the complaints about the mess and such.
When we realized our tax refund was a tenth of what we hoped, I was a little disappointed but didn't say anything. But hubby, who I think has been particularly worried about my state of mind lately, went without my knowledge and took out a little loan to create this little retreat for me. So this Friday, a troupe of three guys showed up with a double-long trailer full of materials, and five and a half hours later, their assemblage retreated, leaving behind Feffie's Cottage. My little she-shed.
|A trailer of bits and bobs arrived at noon.|
|Leveling took about 15 minutes. The blocks were arranged, and the|
floor frame was made in record time.
|They built the walls, tyveked them, put windows|
in, etc, before they lifted them in place.
|They spread the two end walls to make the fourth outside|
|The bit left unfloord was for the decking.|
|Wall 4 goes up.|
|Then it's time to put in the porch wall.|
|Then one guy goes up and puts in the rafters for|
the loft. He did the roof and rafters
pretty much on his own.
|Helpers handed up materials.|
|Sheathing the roof.|
|These guys move fast.|
|Metal was about to go up. Foreman was starting to|
do the trim, which meant the project was almost done.
|Adding the pre-built railing. Cute huh?|
|Adding the ridge cap and rake. finishing touches.|
Trim is done.
|There it is in all its glory. My she-shed dubbed 'Feffie's Cottage'.|
Feffy is my nickname.
This morning, my husband got up early and let me sleep in. We had some leftover flooring from my nesting period/home makeover attack when I was pregnant, so he went ahead and used it up on the floor in the cottage. It's only about 128 square feet of indoor space. Enough room for my cutting and sewing tables, a few chairs, a large IKEA shelf I plan to buy, a small armchair, and my desk and chair for writing. I have them all laid on my floorplan already.
|The main 'area' is about 8 x 10 give or take.|
|This little bay area is about 8 x 5 and it's where my writing|
desk will be (by teh window).
|The loft is pretty big.|
|The little porch. :)|
So there you have it. If all goes well this will be my creation central from now on. I'll be able to do dollhouses again and sew unrestricted. I'll post progress pics as the Feffie's Cottage takes shape.